I miss those days and more than ever I miss my family.
It's so strange that the older we get, the idea of family just changes. Some family moves away and some family moves on to Heaven. What I knew as family when I was a kid is different then I know now. Family to me when I was a kid was about mom, dad, brothers, grama, grandpa, cousins and an aunt and uncles. Now family includes my immediate family still, but so many have moved on while others have moved in.
Thankfully I'm blessed with a beautiful family. I just miss them. When I was younger I was upset about my parents not being together. Now I look at it all as a blessing. I wouldn't be who I am today without those obstacles. And now I have more people around to love me and my hubby because my parents have found people in their lives as well. My stepdad has been a great addition to my little family– a man who I know would do anything for me and has. And my dad's fiance is a new addition that I wish was around while I was growing up. Maybe things would have been a little easier on us then. Maybe we could have been a little closer when I was younger if he had someone back then who seemed to care about his kids as well as her own.
I know it's all a cycle. Most of us aren't friends with the friends we had in elementary school. Most of us aren't lucky enough to keep those connections going for an entire lifetime. I've got two best buds that I know will be with me throughout my lifetime. I had tons of friends when I was younger, but I know now that it's not quantity, it's quality. And I couldn't ask for more.
As this cycle continues I know one thing for sure; my hubby is my family now. And once we decide to start the cycle again and maybe have a child of our own, I look forward to a few things... I'd like to have dinners with my family and with my friends. I'd like to be lucky enough to get together with them not only on birthdays and holidays, but whenever we feel the need to. Family and friends have an open invitation. No need to call ahead of time, just stop by. That's how it was when we were kids, that's how I wish it could be now. I know my mom knows that the door is always open. I love that feeling. I love that she knows that family is always welcome.
I wish my brothers could be around when we decide to have a child of our own. I wish they decided to have children. I wish that our kids could play together... stuff that just isn't in the cards. But a girl can dream right? At least he/she will have gramas and grandpas to be spoiled by.
I just miss those days when nothing mattered but having an extra pair of gloves and an extra pair of pants to change into when the first stuff got soaked from the snow...
Oh to be a kid again.
1 comment:
If its any consolation my children will be calling you "Aunt Dana" I <3 you
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