Guilt...

I feel a little guilty for not going to one of Jen's classes last night, but I couldn't spare a minute of time. I woke up with every intent of going, but unfortunately I was thrown a couple of assignments my way, and had to opt for my computer screen and books instead. I know I needed to do it, but I'm really enjoying my workouts. With this class and work schedule, the only day this week that I'll be able to go is Friday afternoon. It's definitely a bummer. I feel stronger when I leave a session with Jen and I feel invigorated. It's just disappointing that school and work are causing so many conflicts. Maybe once the wedding passes I'll be able to fit more in. It's just that writing 3 or 4 papers a week doesn't leave me much time for myself anymore. And I love time for myself. To curl up with a good book or a cup of hot tea. That's the perfect ending to my day. I just wish I was able to have those perfect days a lot more. I guess I'll have to suck it up for now. As long as I keep my eating in check, I'll still be able to lose these last couple of pounds. Thankfully I do a lot of walking at school and I still try to make time for my 20 minute pilates dvd. I guess I'm starting to realize that I can't do it all. I have to get enough sleep in order to even function throughout the day, so sometimes the working out is the only thing that I can put aside; for now. So right now, I'm doing some class work between classes and sipping on a cup of green tea with lemon (courtesey of my big thermos and my lemon packets). I'm just waiting for those precious hours of sleep that await me tonight. And tomorrow afternoon before class, I hope to get some great stretching in with my pilates dvd. I need it. My back can't take this driving anymore. I'd rather stand all day than do this for 14 more weeks! But alas, I'll be working tonight, so that standing thing will be happening soon enough. I just can't wait for our wedding day... and now my best bud has asked me to be in her wedding in 10 months! It's so much to look forward to... I love getting dressed up and having fun with friends, and now I have an even better body to put clothes on! Yeaahh me! At least that's something that I'm not guilty about :)

One Month Till the Wedding!

One month till our wedding and I'm on such a perfect path to losing the weight I want to before the big day.  I'm at 151 right now, by the big day I'd like to weigh 145-140.  For me, that's a size 6.  A size 6! I haven't been that size since I was 16 and this time, I'm actually doing it the right way.  Eating right, mostly a diet of protein, fruits and veggies and lots and lots of exercise.  Jen Murphy is a miracle worker.  My body is changing so much and I love looking at myself in the mirror right now.  I can do pull up crunches with ease now.  Crunches are getting easier and easier.  Squats are like nothing now.  The pain is getting easier to bare after my workouts and I feel so energetic.  I'm following Jen's recommendation of making sure I have protein everyday.  I take this protein called New Whey.  It's basically like a shot of liquid.  Not like a needle, it's like a shot of alcohol- but doubled.  It's the easiest way for me to get my protein in and I can drink it right after my workout or keep it in my pocketbook and drink it quick at work.  It's the easiest way for me to get it in- and I don't have to get out my blender or drink some nasty thick shake.  I love this protein.   Check it out.  

Today was my wedding dress fitting.  It was amazing.  The dress is big on me, but they don't want to take it in until my next fitting on September 12th because they don't want to take it in more than once.  My veil was almost finished and my hair clip is amazing.  I'm beyond cloud 9 right now!  Unfortunately, losing this weight has also caused me to lose a lot of my boobs.  It sucks, but I'd rather be thinner with a smaller chest then big with a bigger one.  If the fat has got to go, it can go from anywhere on my body, I'm not too particular.  I can't wait for my next fitting!  So much to look forward to... 30 days!  I'll officially be a Mrs.  

So Jen is adding a Wednesday and Friday afternoon class to her schedule once the kids go back to school.  A 1 pm class is perfect for us night working girls.  That means I might be able to get in 4 days a week with Jen.  I love it... I think I'm getting obsessed with working out.  This is a nice addiction.  I'd rather love this than my obsession with food.  Life is good...

Keep Moving Forward...

Jen Murphy is the best motivation for me to get my ass off the couch.  I can't stop reading these past few weeks and I'm getting addicted to tv.  It's so nice to just have to work and not go to school at the same time.  I wish life was always this simple.  Just work at night, sleep in till before noon and keep night owl hours with my hubby.  I'm loving it.  But Jen is keeping me working out and our upcoming wedding is my other motivation to keep eating right.  I had to work out with Jen on my own on Monday because my workout partner couldn't make it.  I don't mind going one on one with Jen but sometimes I like having a partner to grunt and complain with me while working my ass off.  I'm starting to love the pain.  I know it's working.

This past weekend was my bridal shower (AHHHH! sooo emotional!) and I loved every minute of it.  It was nice to have everyone together for a happy reason and not for a sad one (these funerals have got to stop!).  It was hard to be perfect with all the amazing food around, but I tried to stick with the fruit and veggie platters.  Ok, I had some Herr's sour cream and onion chips and a piece of my amazing cake, but other than that I thought I did pretty good.  I skipped the ziti and the sandwiches from my favorite sub place.  I'm trying to not strive for perfection, but just for consistency.  I just want to be on track to losing 10 more pounds before the wedding.  I can't wait for my next fitting, but I won't like it if I haven't lost anymore.  So I got to keep moving forward and stop being stuck in this rut.  Now I have the memories of my bridal shower cake, and the future of my wedding cake to get me through these next couple weeks without junk food... Oh yea, and the wedding license application that's sitting in our safe.  What a motivation, seeing my new last name in print (AHHH! sooo emotional)  let's just keep the emotions for my tears and not soak them up with food...