Thursday, February 21, 2013

Sundays and Crazy Moments...

So I have this crazy lady that comes into my job. And when I say crazy, I mean the crazy cat lady kind of crazy, but say you mix crazy cat lady with some alcohol, and you have my customer. She's a kind soul. She's a sweet woman who I think has had a pretty rough life and she also lives with a crazy note-writing schizophrenic—what a combination!

She's the kind of woman who is extremely talented at expressing herself in poetry and writing, albeit in a kitty cat notebook. She's confessed to me that her family had never believed in her and that they always told her that she could never be anyone special. She cries to me. She laughs. She breaks my heart.

She has become the center of attention for a crew of customers that comes in—literally just to see her. When she walks in the door they cheer her name. I love seeing the smile it puts on her face. We all have a laugh at her expense when she starts dancing or when she starts doing bar stool yoga (i know what you're thinking, but no, really, she does actual yoga moves while sitting on the bar stool). We all chuckle at her little sayings. At her crush on one of the crew. But the best part about the whole thing is that she knows; and she loves it. We make her feel special. We make her feel wanted. She says that with us she feels something that she's never felt in her life. It's all a lot of fun. And I make a great amount of money because of her entertainment, but I can honestly say, when she's moved on from the hotel that's by the bar, I think we're all going to be a little sad.

This past Sunday she told me that she thinks that I'm a good soul. That me and another customer were the most kind-hearted out of the group. That she loves me. I had a bad week and I have to say, it made me smile. She calls me "Scarlett" because she says that I remind her of Scarlett Ohara (I say, I wish I had that infamous 18-inch waist). That I remind her of a movie star or a 1950's pin-up. I don't mind the flattery, even if she's not the best judge.

Sometimes she brings her teddy-bear in to the bar. She calls it, "Father." She wears a fedora which quickly gave her the nickname of, "Crazy hat lady" or "Scarecrow." She brings in her notebook, which she gave me the pleasure to read one night. How heartbreaking. How sad her life has been. How sad her view on the world, but how poignant too. She talks on a cellphone sometimes even if no one's there because as she put it, "sometimes Scarlett, it's just nice to feel important and have other people think you're important too."

I came into work one day and found a present to me from her. I was a tad weirded out, but intrigued. It was toiletrees from a hotel in Atlantic City. She's also tried to give me a half used, knock-off bottle of Chanel No5; telling me that all classy girls should wear Chanel No5, even if they can't get the real thing. I sadly turned her down saying that I only use one perfume, but that I thought the gesture was incredibly sweet. She was upset this week because I didn't receive a toy duck that she bought for my puppies and said that I had to track down the culprit who stole it from me because she spent eight dollars on it and wouldn't see it go to waste for some thief! She then told me that the person who stole it or forgot to tell me about it, must be fired on the spot for being untrustworthy. Don't worry. I found the toy duck. No one was fired. I'm sure my pup Luna will enjoy humping it; although it does make a duck call sound when it's squeezed, so that could make it very interesting.

We've all had our fun at her expense. But I've had a few heart to hearts with her and I know that the fun we have gets her out of a lot of manic moments. I invited her out with a note last week to get her to come and see everyone (also so I could get people to come out to see her!). I felt kinda bad afterwards and some people were saying it was mean. Then I saw her the next day and she told me she cried happy tears for the first time in a long time and that it made her day. She told me she had a really rough night and when she woke up to find a note from me, she couldn't contain herself. Even if it started off with selfish intentions, the night was fabulous and the end result was a very happy woman. I felt redeemed.

At the end of the night on Sunday Funday she told me she was going to take a few days off from the bar to recover because the night was just, "too much fun." There were definitely a lot of moments of dancing, giggling, crying, and singing on her part. She was reveling in the attention. Then before she left she stopped and said, "Scarlett I know you all think I'm crazy, and I'm ok with that, I love you guys, but you're going to think I'm a little bit crazier after I say this, but I thought you should know and I have to say it. It runs in my family; I'm a little bit psychic. Now I know you want a baby right now so bad, but it's just not the time for you. You're meant to do big things. Really big things. You're going to have your baby eventually, but just not now, not at this time. But don't think you're not going to have one, you will. But I'm sorry to say honey it's not going to be a girl like you want, it's going to be a boy. But you'll still love him and you'll have your baby finally. But first you have to do big things."

I almost started to cry. How did this woman know? It's not something I talk about at my job. It's not something I reveal to every soul, especially the wanting a girl thing. It was just a weird moment. There have been so many strange moments with this woman, but this one took the cake and threw me for a loop. I'm sure it could just be some sorta fluke. I mean women my age want babies. Women want daughters. But how strange. I told a few people and some got chills, others thought I was gonna join her in the crazy club. But for someone like me who's had this desire for so many years, to hear those words, from someone that's almost a stranger, how could I not be baffled?

I'm going to miss her when she's gone. And not just because she helps bring in people because they like to watch the show she puts on. Not just because my tips have doubled. People may make fun. They might jest at her expense. But she's a kind soul. A kindred spirit. And I hope we give her a lot of happiness in this crazy world. And if we think our world is crazy on a daily basis, I can only imagine what her world is like. I hope we all never have to experience what it's like to be living in a hotel, sad, alone, and hopeless— with your only friend being a scary schizophrenic with a drinking problem.

I hope she's not just crazy. I hope she's insightful and tad psychic. I hope I am meant to do big things. I sure know that I dream big. Let's hope that her vision prevails on all levels.  I wouldn't mind being on a tour or down in Nashville holding my baby boy. I'm not picky.

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