One Month Till the Wedding!

One month till our wedding and I'm on such a perfect path to losing the weight I want to before the big day.  I'm at 151 right now, by the big day I'd like to weigh 145-140.  For me, that's a size 6.  A size 6! I haven't been that size since I was 16 and this time, I'm actually doing it the right way.  Eating right, mostly a diet of protein, fruits and veggies and lots and lots of exercise.  Jen Murphy is a miracle worker.  My body is changing so much and I love looking at myself in the mirror right now.  I can do pull up crunches with ease now.  Crunches are getting easier and easier.  Squats are like nothing now.  The pain is getting easier to bare after my workouts and I feel so energetic.  I'm following Jen's recommendation of making sure I have protein everyday.  I take this protein called New Whey.  It's basically like a shot of liquid.  Not like a needle, it's like a shot of alcohol- but doubled.  It's the easiest way for me to get my protein in and I can drink it right after my workout or keep it in my pocketbook and drink it quick at work.  It's the easiest way for me to get it in- and I don't have to get out my blender or drink some nasty thick shake.  I love this protein.   Check it out.  

Today was my wedding dress fitting.  It was amazing.  The dress is big on me, but they don't want to take it in until my next fitting on September 12th because they don't want to take it in more than once.  My veil was almost finished and my hair clip is amazing.  I'm beyond cloud 9 right now!  Unfortunately, losing this weight has also caused me to lose a lot of my boobs.  It sucks, but I'd rather be thinner with a smaller chest then big with a bigger one.  If the fat has got to go, it can go from anywhere on my body, I'm not too particular.  I can't wait for my next fitting!  So much to look forward to... 30 days!  I'll officially be a Mrs.  

So Jen is adding a Wednesday and Friday afternoon class to her schedule once the kids go back to school.  A 1 pm class is perfect for us night working girls.  That means I might be able to get in 4 days a week with Jen.  I love it... I think I'm getting obsessed with working out.  This is a nice addiction.  I'd rather love this than my obsession with food.  Life is good...

I Love Cooking...

After a nasty bought with my IBS I decided to go off of Jenny Craig.  I think the massive amounts of sodium that are in frozen dinners are just not good for my body.  I'm back to eating fresh fruits, fresh veggies, and chicken... it just made me think, I love to cook.  I love making meals into healthier version of standards.  And my hubby loves my meals too, so I guess I'm not that bad of a cook.  I wish I could open my own restaurant, but to make money you need to have money to spend... maybe one day.

So yesterday, I hit up one of my favorite places, Soon's Orchard, and bought organic peanut butter (for $2) and tons of apples, blueberries, peaches, nectarines... I love local farms, and I wish there were more in my town, but that's the nice thing about going back to school soon, New Paltz is full of local markets.  I hear there's a farmers market on weekends in my area, but to get anything good you have to make it there at 8 am.  That's just not going to happen when I go to bed at about 4 am on Friday night... maybe one day if I ever work a normal schedule.  But tonight I must say, I think I outdid myself with the food for hubby's dinner tomorrow... Cheddar bacon Chicken- low fat, low sodium, and still full of taste.  I can't wait till he eats it.  I love cooking... I've missed it so much.  

Feeling Frustrated!

My weight is not budging.  I'm doing what I'm supposed to do, but nothing is working... am I complaining? Yup.  I have stomach problems that are plaguing me and I feel like it's the reason I just can't budge.  Jen thinks I need to step up my cardio from walking.  I think it's a combination of both.  It's just so damn frustrating.  I'm so hungry after my workouts so it's hard to keep my head moving toward a goal.  I know sometimes I eat too much, but too much fruit and veggies? How is that possible?  How can the things that are good for you, keep you from getting what you really want?!  The days I eat a lot of fruit and veggies to stay off my hunger, my stomach problems act up even more!  I'll try to keep what the hubby says in mind, "drink water and wait 20 minutes before you go for something more to eat..."  I'm trying... did I mention that I read the Monica Seles memoir? I want to say, if she could lose weight, so can I, but let's be realistic...  I've been in such a mood the past couple days because I feel disgustingly bloated and in pain... why can't this be more simple?  I don't want to feel like these sessions with Jen are a waste... this week will be two days in a row with her, let's see some more results body!  ughhh... let me just be in my mood

Step by Step...

Went for a nice walk yesterday with my best bud and it felt great.  My back is hurting a little bit today, but I'm pretty much convinced that it's from my long night at work and not from the walk.  So I'm relaxing at home and sitting on my heating pad.  It's been awhile since I've needed to relax my muscles like this, but it's definitely feeling good.  I got my new easytone shoes from reebok in the mail on Tuesday.  I've been talking about these shoes for awhile, but finally broke down and bought them about two weeks ago.  I needed new shoes for work, so of course, I had to buy them in black.  With as much walking and standing I do at my job, I figured these shoes would be perfect to help me tone up the tush a little bit more.  It could be all a fraud, but I let you know how I feel once I look in the mirror in a couple of months.  Anything to supplement my workouts and eating lifestyle is welcomed.  I like the shoes.  I feel like my legs are a little more achy by the end of the night, so in my eyes, aches mean that post workout feeling that I'm starting to love.  The walk with my bb was so nice.  We walked through a local cemetery that is just beautiful (in the day time).  It leads to the spot where our two local rivers meet, and three states meet.  Unfortunately, our town has let this land get a little overgrown, but we decided that it might be our job to complain to the common council.  They act like they're proud of this spot, yet they've let it become something that doesn't even remotely look like a landmark.  Our walk kept us intrigued... looking at the dates of those who have passed, what names were popular during which time periods, and which names we couldn't even pronounce.  It's a great spot to walk in the sunlight of the afternoon because there are so many trees; you actually forget that it's hot out.  Tomorrow we're walking in High Point.  It's a great walk which can be followed by a swim in a lake.  I don't think it gets any better than that... 

Cancelled Sessions...

I love having workout partners, but it gets hard because of conflicting schedules and cancellations.  I had to workout without my one partner on Monday and my session for tomorrow has been cancelled by my other partner.  I need these sessions to continue flowing forward because it's hard to stay motivated without my trainer.  So I'm popping in my pilates dvd before I head out to work today and tomorrow one of my bff's is going to hit the pavement with me and go on the long walk to nowhere in particular.  I love the long walks, I'm just hoping that the weather holds out tomorrow and saturday.  Right now I just gotta keep my food on track and keep myself motivated to continue working out even if I don't have the benefit of a trainer.  It's not easy going at it alone.  I'm trying to surround myself with like-minded people... hopefully they continue to be motivating...

Keep Moving Forward...

Jen Murphy is the best motivation for me to get my ass off the couch.  I can't stop reading these past few weeks and I'm getting addicted to tv.  It's so nice to just have to work and not go to school at the same time.  I wish life was always this simple.  Just work at night, sleep in till before noon and keep night owl hours with my hubby.  I'm loving it.  But Jen is keeping me working out and our upcoming wedding is my other motivation to keep eating right.  I had to work out with Jen on my own on Monday because my workout partner couldn't make it.  I don't mind going one on one with Jen but sometimes I like having a partner to grunt and complain with me while working my ass off.  I'm starting to love the pain.  I know it's working.

This past weekend was my bridal shower (AHHHH! sooo emotional!) and I loved every minute of it.  It was nice to have everyone together for a happy reason and not for a sad one (these funerals have got to stop!).  It was hard to be perfect with all the amazing food around, but I tried to stick with the fruit and veggie platters.  Ok, I had some Herr's sour cream and onion chips and a piece of my amazing cake, but other than that I thought I did pretty good.  I skipped the ziti and the sandwiches from my favorite sub place.  I'm trying to not strive for perfection, but just for consistency.  I just want to be on track to losing 10 more pounds before the wedding.  I can't wait for my next fitting, but I won't like it if I haven't lost anymore.  So I got to keep moving forward and stop being stuck in this rut.  Now I have the memories of my bridal shower cake, and the future of my wedding cake to get me through these next couple weeks without junk food... Oh yea, and the wedding license application that's sitting in our safe.  What a motivation, seeing my new last name in print (AHHH! sooo emotional)  let's just keep the emotions for my tears and not soak them up with food...

Feeling Exhausted...

It's been a rough food week.  Again.  I just can't seem to visualize what I want.  I guess it's because I haven't had it without doing in all the wrong ways.  I Just feel like unless I'm not eating or purging then I'll never get to my image of where I want myself to be, especially on our wedding day.  Then I had my dress fitting on Wednesday and I cried.  I saw what I want to see on the day of our wedding.  I couldn't believe how many inches I've lost, even though the weight is coming off so slowly.  The dress is going to have to be taken in!  But we're waiting until August to take in the dress, just in case I lose more weight.  I was super excited!  I've been more motivated to work out though lately then to eat right.  I didn't lose weight this week at JC, but I'm hoping that's because it's that time of the month and not because I'm not working hard enough.  I just don't want this weight loss to overtake me like it has before.  I'm trying really hard to stay in control without getting crazy.  It's just hard sometimes to stick in this middle zone when you're so use to the extremes...

My session with Jen was solo this Friday because my fellow bartender was sick.  It was actually really nice to work with Jen on a one on one level.  We focused on my butt and thighs and my lower stomach.  That's me, butt and thigh girl.  But then again, I like my butt, I'm just looking for it to be tighter and not flop out to the side like a pancake when I sit.  How do women get thighs and butts that don't flop to the sides?  I'm hoping Jen has got this answer!  Because I sure as hell have tried everything and trust me, the quick fixes don't work on this forever either!  I can't wait for my next session because I feel so in the zone when I'm there.  I just wish I was in the zone all the time, especially when I'm emotionally in a place that isn't conducive to eating healthy 24/7.  Day by day I swear it gets easier, then I swear it gets harder to stay motivated.  I think I'm a bipolar weight loss addict... one day I'm looking so good and the next second I look like a cow.  Yup, definitely bipolar weight loss.